You are valuable (1)

I learnt at a relatively prestigious institution, one that stands for values and honor. Pietas et veritas- duty and truth was the motto, lofty and noble virtues that definitely have nothing to do with what unfortunately remains to this day one of the absolute worsts in mob behaviour that I witnessed when i was in form 2 [I think]. 

Visitors from a school in Midlands, a mixed school had visited the scenic locale in which my school was located in the Eastern Highlands. And as part of their tour, a visit to our locale was scheduled. When you are academically excellent everyone wants to know what your secret is. For one particular young lady from the school however, what was to happen to her may have been the stuff of nightmares. On a fateful day as the shadows became long and twilight approached, a few boys from a cross of streams were enjoying basketball-a game we call ‘american’ and the visitors from the High school were doing their tour of the school and its facilities. On their way back to their allocated sleeping rooms, they passed by this basketball court and a few members from the school to just get a couple of tries with the basketball. The court had terraces and on the rather lazy day it was, quite a number of people where there and as with teens it was a bit raucous. Most of the visitors who took a shot or two left without much a fuss but however this one girl remained, intent on making at least one successful shot. There were cheers whenever she tried; the very presence of a similar aged girl exciting the vast majority of everyone present. When she did however she was literally swarmed by several overzealous boys, each reaching for a part of her they could hold or touch. One went so far as to grope her from behind, lifting her up as he squeezed her bosom. All this happened in a split second and it was just the awareness of some of the older guys to physically threaten most people away that put a stop to the molestation. The day was not the same for her as she could not hide the tears and pain and returning under the protection of some of the older guys she attempted to come to terms with what had just happened

This is the most stand out incident for me. But it was by no means isolated. Another time a female lecturer had to exit a classroom by means of a window when at night after she had been on duty for supervising night study, there was a sudden power outage. From that day she and her colleague  almost always at night walked in the company of a physically well built lecturer. And from what I gather from a lot of people I have talked to, incidents like this are not isolated to single sex schools but a rather common, though maybe less pronounced. It gets worse when you read the paper with headlines such as “Uncle rapes niece” or “Boy molests older woman” becoming more and more common.

Something somewhere has got to give and we must return to truth wherein we will leave in a peaceful and amazing society.

From what I have written, it seems I should address more and more my words to every man out there. But to be honest and real, my heart today is feeling for the women in our world because of a few recent personal experience and other things i have realised. Part 2 is coming, and it will be for the men but today this one is for the ladies.

You live today in a society where mainstream media tells you that the most and only important thing about you is how beautiful you are, how sexy you are and how well you are able to sexually gratify a man in whatever way he wants, regardless of what you want, what you feel and what really works for you. Society almost has granted you a secondary human status, your opinions don’t really matter and when you fight for them, you are called bossy and unreasonable. You probably have a friend or a friend of a friend who knows first hand what it is to go beyond their own boundaries. You may know someone who has approached a man in authority, a teacher, a lecturer, a doctor, a pastor and that man capitalized on that trust to make a sexual advance, unwelcome, uncalled for and one that almost insinuated they were a whore there for the taking. Noone really cares for your dreams or if you do have them, still they are not your measure. Your measure remains can you still sexually please a man or every man and if you cannot, then who really cares. Any girl who has been to an industry knows what its like to be in the presence of people who simply look upon you like a target, a piece of meat-an instrument to use for their own pleasure without any regard for what you may desire. If you have not realized this, open your eyes and take a look around you.

Sadly however too many girls are listening. You have been sold an image that to be light is beauty and you spend fortunes on creams and lotions that in the end harm you. You have been sold an image that to be as close to nude as possible is sexy and now you think its cool and in to leave your breasts out and to walk in clothes in which you can barely walk without revealing too much let alone sit down. You have been told your natural face is not enough, it needs to be hidden or improved or something else and you spend fortunes on excessive make-up that no matter how much you wear it never seems enough; you must have more, you must have the latest, the in thing and all the while you are so pre-occupied with how you look you have forgotten how to dream and how to love. You have been told “guys have needs” and so whatever they want you do and perform- you send that self picture of yours with nothing or close to nothing on, you no becomes a yes when you think what if I lose him? and what if this simply proves that I am not enough?

I say that it is  time for you to stop listening to the voice of the world, it really don’t like you and start reading more and more what God says you are. My sister, you are fearfully and wonderfully made. That means God Himself took the time with you to make you who you are. You are God’s beloved and you are worthy in His eyes of royal treatment.You are God’s masterpiece and your value is beyond what silver and gold can buy. Honestly, only the blood of Christ could redeem you. That is your worth, your price-the blood of God himself for no man could do it. He has a high opinion of you and He did not make a mistake with you.

What you have been sold to chase is an image, a shadow that cannot be grasped and what you are when you look in the mirror is the real deal, the authentic the flesh and blood creation of God most high. Let noone tell you you are not enough and don’t you dare believe it. See yourself as more than simply your sex appeal, see yourself as the loved of God and from everyone else around you refuse to bow to any other standard. You are beautiful-yes you, you who has been told so often just what is wrong with you, you who wonder if anyone ever thinks you are worth that second look. Let noone define for you what beauty is, just go take a look in a mirror and looking back at you will be someone beautiful. Do not buy the idea that sex appeal is beauty-it is merely conforming to an idea that says all you are ever worth is your sexiness, nothing more and nothing less-dress your body as the temple of God most high, a delightful dwelling place for God Himself and know there are more valuable things than outward appearances. My sister, I rebuke every feeling of inadequacy that resides in you, that society has tried to shove down your throat. In the name of Jesus I rebuke it. You are God’s and all of His attention is on you, ALL and nothing less and you are a treasure in His eyes and as one of His sons I will say in mine too for it is true. Expect nothing less in your relationships, in your experiences. Some may serve less but may they know you are not a willing taker. You are God’s beloved and may you know it and expect it.

If in some way you still have pain in your heart because of what someone has done to you and this has introduced pain, has led you to believe that your experience is the only truth there is and behind every facade is a deep darkness, then this is my prayer for you; May the grace of the Lord Jesus overshadow you-In the name of Jesus let there be peace, healing and restoration in your heart. In His name let the strongholds built over your life now crumble and from this day may the freedom of the Spirit, His fellowship and His companionship wherein there can only be joy be your portion. Amen

Now you will experience peace, restoration, healing and wholeness. May this be the beginning of a fresh season in your life where you see your value as God’s most beautiful creation and where you never again feel inadequate or under pressure to bow to a standard that really ignores your heart, your health and well-being and reduces who you are to a mere piece of arm candy and a sex object.

May the grace of my Father be with you always. And yes I will forever repeat this, you my sister are beautiful and valued and prized beyond what all the wealth in the world could ever buy.